"wouldn't mama be proud"

i had an interesting discussion today.
driving along the interstate is the best time to play the question game. its random, it passes the time, and lets face it. its fun. ish. so today my aunt and i were driving from a far-away city and we got to talking. she said "use one word to describe your mom".

one word. i chose "involved"...

and it got me thinking.

my mom is seriously the most influential person in my life. i love my parents, and my dad is my favorite person on the planet. no lie. but it seems like my mom has been around in my life a lot. she quit her job before i went into kindergarten and literally spent every waking moment with me.

road trips to tennessee, spending a week at camp, days by the pool, writing in journals, teaching us how to be better people. my mom was the best at all of that.

we laughed. we cried. we walked around the block on hot summer nights with freeze-pops and we would talk about anything. we watched movies, top model marathons, and hgtv for hours on end. she loves my friends (i think...if she doesn't, she does a good job hiding it!) and my friends love her. the girls that i've been friends with my entire life have grown up with my mom as well - teaching them things that their moms couldn't.

i didn't think it would be hard to leave my family. yes, i would miss them, but they're my family. its not like they can just get another daughter. i was more worried about my friends moving on and meeting new people...not so much missing my nagging, meddlesome parents.

but i do.

hearing about my cousin and my aunt going shopping for dorm stuff together, or listening to stories of my friends and their moms (even the bad ones) makes me miss my mom even more. she's a phone call away, but that's not as convienent as 4 steps away.

all of this doesn't mean that i love my mom more than my dad. or brother. there have just been more instances where i want to tell my mom random things that only she would get. i miss my dad more than i can even describe. and my brother is my best friend. but its those little things like talking to my mom after my first day at work that just isnt the same on the phone. i miss her. and everyone. but they'll always be in my life, and for that, i am so thankful.

[lift up your heart]
i love you mom!!

on friendships

i've got a lot on my mind lately. i'm the kind of person who, when hearing something insightful or interesting, immediately figures a way to put it into a facebook status or how i could describe it to someone later. but, more often than not, i end up forgetting about what made my little lightbulb go on in a matter of minutes. i totally had a plan for what i would write about for my first post. something about discovering myself, the complications of completely starting over, the hardships of strange people with even stranger accents. but, like usual, i have no idea what the witty words and clever sentences were going to enlighten the readers of blogs all over the world. typical. so i guess i'll write about what i know. we'll start with that.

seventeen days ago, i left my little town that i spent the last eighteen years of my life growing up and making friends and memories for the foreign town of knoxville. yes, it was completely my decision, but when i had made the choice to move, it was a year away and it seemed like i had "forever" before the move was going to change life as i knew it. it's been hard so far. it's weird how people are pretty much the same everywhere. there's the group of friends that you always hang out with, the girls who walk into your house and make themselves at home, the guys running around outside. granted, there's no wiffleball games going on in the front yard back home, and theres not the fifteenish girls that are the given people to spend time with. where i'm from, its a guessing game who we hang out with each night. yes, i have my close best friends who i'm always with, but they're not all friends with each other. i have friends in different groups, friends i may not see for weeks at a time but the second we see each other, its like time never passed. i wouldn't have it any other way.

the girls i've known since elementary school. my friends that i hardly ever see but i know i could call any one of them and talk for hours. i would be lost without them. they've been with me through everything.

the ones who have been with me since freshman year...some of them earlier than that. we probably wouldn't be friends, but the music department has a funny way of making strangers into sisters. we went through a lot together. trips to florida and new york, musicals, concerts, marching, classes. something about seeing each other every day for four straight years builds a kind of friendship that will never be broken. i love these girls!

i can't even beging to describe the bond i have with these two girls. its the kind of friendship that doesn't have barriers. we say what we want to say. we accept each other. there have been ups and downs. we've gone through groups and friends, but it's always been the three of us. i can't believe i've been lucky enough to call them my friends. i wouldn't trade them for anyone else in the world!

my freshest friends. we've only been friends for about nine months, but we became fast friends. our music, dancing, inside jokes, random pictures, taco dip parties, movie nights, bonfires, car rides, boat trips, san laurio runs, fed-ex sightings, video making, late night chats, fun loving memories will last a lifetime. i can't wait to see them again.

i'm excited to start a new life and make new friends, but the thought of not seeing the most influential people in my life for any span of time makes my eyes well up. i know we're all going out seperate ways, but we'll stay friends forever. i'm sure of it.